April 2001

The dog ate my homework.
"What are your favorite student excuses?"

Your responses will be posted here as received, and may be used in other FACCC publications.

Please e-mail responses to Communications Director Katherine Martinez, k7martinez@aol.com, by April 30 (use the subject "April Question").

Answers received: 

• Your answer could be here

• tommac@pacific.net (Tom MacMillan)—This may qualify as an excuse, but it was far more. My Buddhist monk student Heng Wu once turned in a blank piece of paper for his response to my question seeking an interpretation of a Zen Koan. When he submitted the blank piece of paper, he remarked, "I know I am enlightened enough to provide you the answer; I doubt that you are enlightened enough to understand it.!" Of course he got an 'A.' on the assignmnet. He later put down his robes and later finished his MAT at Stanford University, and is now undoubtedly receiving much more lame excuses than the one he offered me that spring day so many years ago.—Tom MacMillan, Faculty Emeritus, Mendocino College.

• luntcc@earthlink.net (Lunt, Charles)—"My homework is being held captive by my pen............."
  
• Pat.Garity@gcccd.net (Pat Garity)—This one is the saddest of them all........My little brother got shot at high school.

• Ruiss@exi.arc.losrios.cc.ca.us (Ruis, Stephen)—My favorite is a student who missed a test because he "had to take his grandmother bowling." I called Grandma and verified the story (Truth!) and after 10 minutes on the phone with her, I cut the student some slack. Grandma was quite a formidable woman; I think I would have taken her bowling to avoid her displeasure.—Steve Ruis, Chemistry Department, American River College

• FACCCPres@aol.com—I once had a student in my American literature class, write on a test, in classic Melville fashion, only "I prefer not."—Carolyn Russell

• jlfaccc@aol.com—While I was never as bold as Heng Wu, I once turned in the following paper in AP English (assignment: to write a story with a moral): A man lived. A man died. Moral: Brevity is still the soul of wit. (I received an "A." And she was a very hard grader.)—Jonathan Lightman

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